James Stryker
by deadlybelley6369
Summary: This is about James Stryker, a fat old man who doesn't love lucaya. contains Lucas/Maya
1. chapter 1

i hate james stryker heres why:

hes really condescending

plus he cant even spell right

if you hate him too

leave me a message or comment

ily and choke stryker


	2. reason 2

he diddles sabrina carpenter

tape cknfesaion: i eaped zabrkna


	3. reason 3

his lines r sos cheezy

blah blah blah ily blaj blah sjsjsksnso stfu


	4. reason 4

his name isnt evem his real name

EHAT R U HIDING SEAN HMMM


	5. reason 5

hes fucking the opposite of funny

liyerally hes just like "i might make a story LOL"

likr why is rhat funny u suck bags of dicks i-


	6. The Story of James Stryker

*cue the depressing music about childhood*

Ever since Sean was a boy, he wanted to fuck. Fuck men, women, cows, pigs, goats, boats, you name it. But, one day, he just realized he wasn't attractive at all. That no one would ever want to fuck him because he was just plain ugly. So, he swore to get noticed by people and at least imagine sex.

That's when he got the idea from watching Friends-

-to start making smut. He's seen sex scenes, and he thought to himself it wasn't that hard.

Now he's 23. He's maturing, aging, just blossoming into what I like to call: a total dick. Alas, he was old enough to write smut when he first began a fanfiction account, he realized his name was boring as fuck, so he got a new one:

James Stryker.

It sounds like he's a superhero of some sorts, right? Not even close. If he was, his name would be Shit Man. Because he's a little shit.

ANYWAYS, after he made the account, he published his first story about a fucking kid's show named ANTFarm. I'm sure you've heard about it. Well, that's when he got all his fame. He got more followers and favorites than any other smut writers on the net! Good for him, don't you think?

Well, one night, while he channel surfing in his parent's basement, he came across...

GIRL MEETS WORLD!

Immediately, he became dangerously obsessed with it. It led him to many great ships and more tv shows. Kids, tv shows, to be exact. Anyways, everything was going swell!

Until... he posted one little oneshot called My Best Friend's Boyfriend.

That's when Illuminati69 aka. peydrea22 came in. She told him in a nice way how the shit story was shit. Well, he was absolutely furious! So furious his 86 year old mother had to scold him from the top of the basement steps with no robe on. Gross, right? Well, how do you think he got the idea for all those incest stories?

Anyways, every single night, he would cry himself to sleep because of the truthful comment he got. After being cheered up by a couple of 59 year old hookers, he got an idea to make not one, but TWO rucas oneshots in a row. Bad mistake, my friend.

He mostly got good reviews until a certain someone noticed he had talked bad about her friend and lucaya shippers in general. Let me tell you, this girl gave him everything! Burned, roasted, and boiled his ass!

About maybe an hour later, Sean or "James" was lubing up, getting ready to jack his sadness off when he came across a book titled "James Stryker"

"Oh, yippee!" he thought, clicking on it while happily pausing Powerpuff Girls.

Alas, the hate never ended and the book was full of the truth, but as you know, our little Sean cannot handle the truth. He got so riled up, that he actually rounded up all his minions and forced them to hate on the truth speaking gi **rl, named deadlybelley6369.** **Of course, she's not a fucking crybaby like him and ignored the comments, like a normal person should've done.**

"She hates me!" he cried, throwing his mother's laptop at the TV.

"Hey! Calm the fuck down!" his mother yelled from the steps, opening the basement door.

"Yes, mom!" he rolled his eyes.

But he forgot one thing,

She didn't hate him. No, hate is too much of a strong word for such a little weak man.

 **She... envied him. Envied him for being so strong and not getting a disease from jacking off every night, morning, and afternoon.**

Anyways,

James, let's get one thing straight. I did not say I would choke you, or will. I said I hoped you choked on saggy tits and dry dildos.

Also,

Why such a cunt?


	7. lucaya

"MAYA!" Lucas shouted, from top pf the steps.

"Yeah?!" Maya yelled from downstairs.

"WHERE IS HE?! WHERE IS THAT BAG OF SAGGY TITS THAT MADE SMUT ABOUT ME AND RILEY?!"

"HE'S TIED UP IN OUR BASEMENT!"

"GOOD! BRB!" Lucas ran down the steps and into the basement.

There, was Jamez Stryker, tied up eith a dry dildo in his mouth.

"Hello, Sean."

"LET ME GO! LET ME GO!" james sobbed.

"no"

"WHY NOT!?"

"cuz i said so."


	8. Hero

I'm a hero


End file.
